Score Assessment: You’re Stage of Learning Is [Winging].
The biggest question that the Wingers have when it comes to meeting women is: “What do I say and how do I get her attracted to me?”
Most men have no idea how to communicate with women.
When we find ourselves toe to toe with a beautiful girl, most of us get tongue-tied. When we get tongue-tied we typically default into our standard operating procedure.
I like to call this operating procedure the “Boring Job Interview Mode.”
See if you can relate to this scenario:
You’re at a bar for happy hour with one of your buddies. He catches you checking out a sexy and well put-together brunette and starts goading you into approaching her. “Come on, don’t be a wuss!” He says. You’d rather crash and burn then look like a wimp in your friend’s eyes so you walk over with no idea what you’re gonna say. You don’t walk over with confidence, you walk over with anxiety and it feels like you are walking into the lion’s den. You get there and blurt something out.
It’s typically one of these statements:
* “Hi… Uhhh, do you come here often?”
* “Hey… so you out drinking tonight?”
* “Hi… how you doing?”
She responds with one of these statements:
* “Hi, not really.”
* “Yup… I’m drinking.”
* “I’m fine.”
So you follow it up with one of these statements:
* “So where are you from?”
* “What do you do for a living?”
* “Do you live around here?”
She gives you one-word answers and you continue to ask boring job interview questions because it’s the only thing you can think of. Eventually, you run out of questions to ask or she excuses herself.
Where To Go From Here?
You’ve now identified both your External Alignment and Stage of Learning. Your External Alignment will dictate the strategies while your Stage of Learning will dictate how fast you make the changes.
For example, if you are stuck in a Winging Mindset, you’ll be much more successful with a structured plan to help you take consistent action. And if you found yourself in the Nice/Sweet Guy or Analytical/Smart Guy spot on the External Alignment grid, your best bet are strategies that will allow you to become more comfortable dealing with sexual tension so you can confidently express yourself around the women you are attracted to.
For a detailed list of strategies, regardless of where you fall on the grid you can see the Confidence Alignment Kit.